All about me...

My thoughts have been so focused on myself...especially these past few days. I'm getting frustrated and annoyed over the silliest of things, and it's so not where I want to be. Yet God keeps pouring out His grace!

Last week I was getting so frustrated about Josiah calling me Daddy. I was caught up on a word. Then just as I was about my most frustrated, he starts saying Mommy in the sweetest voice.

Well then, over the weekend, I started getting frustrated because we hadn't had anyone look at the house since Monday. As we drove to church Sunday, I was just about to complain to David about this when we got a phone call. A realtor was asking to bring someone over in the afternoon. YAY! Not only that, but we received another phone call later for another person to come over. The one family came over twice that day, and we received an email saying they are probably making a decision this week. (No haven't heard anything else yet.)

And yet, even with God pouring out His Grace despite my grumbling, yesterday I found myself being so selfish and self-absorbed in my thoughts. The kids were LOUD and driving me nuts, mostly because I was doing stuff for me and leaving them to entertain themselves a lot. Josiah screamed and cried when I put him down for a nap. But I was thinking about how inconvenient that was for me rather than how I could help him feel secure. David was at his new job for the day, so it was already going to be later when he got home...and he left a lot later than he planned, so it was going to be after 7:30 until he came home. I was annoyed. Not for David having that drive, but for me. Because I was "stuck" with the kids longer. I finally got my thoughts straightened out a bit. I ordered pizza, put the kids in the bath after dinner, and played and spent time with my children. That way we were ready to spend some time with Daddy when he arrived home.

I think I'm finally, getting it through my head...again. So, I'm practicing thankfulness. (Didn't I post about that not TOO long ago?) I'm starting now. Here is my Thankful list...that I was tagged to do at Thanksgiving, but never quite did.

~I am thankful that Josiah is home. He is able to speak and is learning to communicate what he wants. I am thankful he wants to be with me. I am thankful he likes being with his sister. I am thankful he is healthy and full of energy.

~I am thankful Elizabeth is my firstborn. I don't love her any more than Josiah, just differently. I am thankful she still wants Mommy time. I am thankful she is good at entertaining herself, but does her best to play and help with Josiah.

~I praise God that we don't have to be in a rush to sell our house, that we have a place to live, and that we've already had 14 people come to see our house! I know that everything is in His time, and even if David has to commute every day for a while, God will care for us. I'm thankful that for the last 4 years that David has had a 10 min. commute and very flexible hours. I'm thankful that this commute will not last forever. I'm thankful that David has a very good job that he enjoys. And it provides enough for me to stay home and care for our children.

~Most of all, I'm thankful that God does not treat me as I deserve. Even when I'm not loving to Him, He loves me and showers me with His grace.