Still a long way to go...

...16 days to be exact. But today, I've already started getting some butterflies thinking about our court date. Before, the reason would have been because I was thinking it is so soon and we're not ready (There will still probably be MANY of those days!) However, today it was more because I'm anxious for Josiah to be home! I absolutely know that it's in God's timing, and it will be okay if we don't make it through court the first time. But still... :-)

I'm praying for you ladies waiting on the news from today! I'm amazed at your peace! After today, though, I have been thinking I'm really glad our court date is a Monday instead of a Friday! I'm keeping you in my prayers!

I just want to know...

...who God has for our family! I actually don't mind waiting a LITTLE bit for him/her/them to come home (I say that NOW!), but I want to know who is coming. Will there be one or two? Girls or boy? What ages? For one thing, I want to be able to pray more specifically. For another, I want to be able to choose names, and I don't feel we can properly do that until we see the children and know their given names. Third, I don't know how to prepare bedrooms, and the resulting rearranging of the rest of the house. I feel so unsettled because there are so many decisions that are waiting.

Plans

Proverbs 16:
3 Commit to the LORD whatever you do, and he will establish your plans. 4 The LORD works out everything to its proper end—even the wicked for a day of disaster

I have to admit; I have not been doing this very well. This is a concept I know and believe, yet I keep wanting to hold onto my plans. The waiting and the unknown seem so difficult. But GOD Himself, the Creator of heaven and earth, is in control. HE will work everything out to its proper end.

Waiting

Waiting has been on my mind a lot lately. I realized, it's been over a year and half since we first went to the information meeting at BCS. It's been over a year now since we requested our formal application. At that time, we thought there was a good chance we'd have another child in our home by now. Yet this year we had to start almost back at the beginning again.

God has a very different idea about time than we do. This was posted on one of the forums I read, and it is a good reminder. It is taken from http://www.asliceoflifetogo.com/2006/03/16/waiting-for

Waiting.

We do a lot of waiting.

In Phoenix, we wait for rain. In Seattle, they wait for sunshine. We all wait in line at the grocery store. Some waiting is expected. No one in their right mind ever goes to the Social Security office or the Department of Motor Vehicles expecting to be in and out in five minutes. Some waiting we plan for.

It’s waiting when we didn’t plan to wait that is the hardest.

Like waiting for a job when we’ve been unemployed two months after the savings runs out. Waiting for the doctor to say this round of chemo therapy finally worked. Waiting for a baby to place in the nursery that’s been ready, and empty, for years. Waiting for that estranged relationship to be reconciled.

This is the waiting that exasperates and exhausts us. And if we’re honest, it is a waiting that frustrates and angers us. Because deep down, whether we admit it or not, we realize we’re waiting on God. He could do something about it if He wanted to. So why doesn’t He? Why doesn’t He do something? Anything to show us a glimpse of forward progress?

Most of the time we want our waiting to be over because we’re ready for a change of scenery. We want to be delivered from our immediate circumstances.

All we can see is what’s in front of us.

God has a different vantage point. He sees the big picture.

Though it pains me to say it, our waiting may be God’s working.

Abraham was an old and childless man when God promised him a son. If it was a hilarious thought that at 75 years old Abraham would be shopping for bottle warmers and a bouncy seat, then it was beyond incredible for him to be in the delivery room at age 100. But that’s what happened. God promised Abraham a son. And delivered on His promise 25 years later. They named him Isaac. It means “laughter”. Being a new dad when you’re 100 is pretty funny.
We can read the account in the book of Genesis and we can wonder about the wait. But God must have had His reasons.

Albert Baylis put it this way,
“It appears God wants to do more with Abraham than drop promises on him. Abraham had received an irrevocable promise from God. But being God’s candidate for blessing is not a trip to Disneyland. Because God is going to bless Abraham, he’s going to make him into a man of faith. Because He is going to make Abraham a blessing, God will take whatever time is necessary. And God has never let time bother Him.”

Time bothers us. But it doesn’t bother God.

If you’re waiting, know that God is working. It’s ok to yell and scream about it. It’s ok to wonder how and why. The Bible is full of people who, in the middle of their dry dust wait, threw up their questions to God. No worries. He is big enough to handle them. You may not get the answers you like. You may not get answers at all. But this much is true. God always delivers on His promises. In His time and in His way. And always for your good and His glory.

Hang in there.

The rain is coming.

Rough Day

Hi All,

It's been kind of a rough day with us (Elizabeth and Mommy). Elizabeth went to sleep early last night, but I still had to wake her up to get ready for school this morning. Then she was moody and contrary...not totally unusual. However, on the way to school she randomly said, "God is not here. He only is here at night." We
talked about it, and I'm still not sure why she said that. But she said she sees Him at night, but He's not around during the day. Then she was asking questions about where God lives and such, so I kind of let it go.


On the way home from shopping this evening, we were singing, "We are the children of God." Suddenly, adamently, she said she does not like God. When I asked her the reason she said that she wants to be a big sister and she wants her brother home NOW. Then she started sobbing and telling me over and over again that she wants her brother home with us and that she doesn't like God. I tried to talk with her about
how God is in control and we can't always understand why or when things happen, but we know that God knows the best way. And even though Joshua isn't home with us yet, God is still taking care of him and loves Joshua and her. She did say, "and God loves you and Joshua's foster mom," and so on. Then she moved on to a whole other
subject.


I thinking we did TOO well preparing her to have a little brother. I am very grateful that she understands that God is in control in our adoption. Maybe this is part of the reason she's been more emotional lately, too. Any thoughts or suggestions for helping a preschooler to understand His timing?